Just a Woman Tending To Her Soul

Jan 15, 2022

Taking a short reprieve, stepping back and just making quiet space is a gift I now give myself regularly, perhaps more in the last couple of years than ever before.

I’ve learned the signals from my mind, body and spirit that rest is needed…and not necessarily, physical. Often, my mind and spirit need rest too.

When I start feeling heaviness, anxiety, sadness, frustration, or possibly the need to go to the refrigerator a few too many times, I realize it’s time to stop and take some time for me.

Sometimes all I need is just an afternoon off to read, play in my garden or dance my feelings away. But sometimes…it’s deeper than that and I need to reflect upon what I’m thinking, doing or not doing, or what’s happening around me.

In our complex world, it’s easy to ignore unease and keep intently moving forward, a highly beneficial practice….most days.  However, if I neglect my uneasiness for too long, it usually does...

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Hello In There!

Dec 19, 2021

It’s been happening more and more lately. I’m out in public, doing my thing. Happy. My older, blue eyes twinkling. Seeking out other eyes to connect with. But few are open for business. The “CLOSED” sign is up and I can’t for the life of me, get their attention, so that they can open up and receive the smile I’m giving them.
 
Through the years, my day has been upgraded many times because of the smile or kindness a friend….or a stranger has generously given me.  I’m not saying this lightly. Life is challenging, not all of us make it through. Honestly, some days, it was a sweet smile from a complete stranger that gave me just the glimmer of hope I needed. I greatly appreciate a genuine smile. 
 
And so….all my life…I have made a point of giving my smiles back – it’s my gift. It’s a way to connect with another human being. 
 
...

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Say "Yes" to Life!

Dec 09, 2021


We piled into the Forerunner, the three of us, friends who happen to love to write, embarking on a short adventure to the mountains of Taos, New Mexico. We had a loose plan to find a great place for brunch, make our way to a local art gallery owned by a favorite artist and drive the Enchanted Circle around New Mexico’s largest mountain, Wheeler Peak.

One writer friend requested us each to bring a folding chair so we could stop on the side of the road to write, which I have never done but was excited to try. I said "Yes!".
As we started the scenic drive through various small towns, we enjoyed the windy river, small rickety creeks along the highway and the advancing majestic mountains. Climbing in elevation, the vegetation changed to thicker tall pines, the temperature dropped, and the clouds gathered.

Arriving in Taos, we devoured a delightful brunch, browsed a few unique shops and spent some time ever so carefully, saying "yes" to a purchase or two in one of our...

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My Family Is Not So Different Than Yours

Dec 03, 2021

My family is not so different than many.
 
We love each other and mostly support one another through ventures, achievements, misadventures, mistakes…LIFE with all its ups and downs and all-arounds.
 
When I think of each member of my family, I smile and recall heartwarming memories. We’ve been through a lot together. Billy broke his arm on the ATV at a family gathering. Some time back, Uncle Alvin slid into home base just in the nick of time to win the game. One of beloved nieces found her mom, my sister, overdosed in her bedroom. Several of us were the first in our families to graduate with college degrees. Quite a few family members have struggled with addiction. This year, a couple precious babies were born.
 
As a family, we’ve experienced much loss, some of it divided us and alienated us. Some of it, brought us together. Some of us, are not as supportive as others…yet. Some of us, are self-involved and don’t have time nor...
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Gratitude for the Smooth... and the Bumpy Road

Nov 24, 2021

 

It’s the day before Thanksgiving and on this busy day I stopped for a while, contemplated about people and what they experience.

I just met a grieving woman whose husband died suddenly just a few months ago. She related how she became very sick the next day and had to be hospitalized. She was ashamed of her fear and seemingly faithless behavior for a few days afterwards.

Her heavy-hearted spirit silently spoke with mine…and my heart reached out and held it tight for a moment.

I felt it. So did she.

One older gentleman I know, was pushed out of the home he shared for the last 15 years with his nephew, by his nephew’s new wife. He now lives alone in a senior group home, feeling rejected, lonely and a bit angry.

Yet another family I know received some devastating news, and life as they know it, will change and their hearts are broken.

Still, many other people and families are living their usual lives, preparing for coming holidays and celebrations.

I am...

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I Hope We Dance!

Nov 17, 2021

An impromptu visit from my adult daughter this weekend demonstrated to me, once again, that “Love is ALL there is”.

The mother-daughter relationship is deep, complex, and emotional – yes, a dance, of sorts.

If we allow it, it is easy to let old baggage, differences, and small irritations grow and develop into a huge cavern between us – making it impossible to stay in step with one another.

There are many explanations for this mother-daughter phenomenon, but we can talk about that another time. Today, I wish to share that it’s absolutely possible and worth working towards a meaningful and quality relationship with our daughters and mothers.
Both of us, my daughter, Amy and I, valuing and prioritizing our relationship above many other things (such as control, looking good to the outside world, self-centeredness, and being right), has allowed us to grow our patience, skills, and love.

It wasn’t always that way. There were many nights I lay in bed...

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Finding My Way

Nov 10, 2021

Rumbling with my own unrealistic fear and trepidation is nothing new, but I thought that I had long overcome much of it. So…it was hardly recognizable to me when it reared its sly head during the pandemic.

Faith and love are very slowly pulling me out of this darkness I’ve experienced.

Faith shows up in many ways for me. This time, in the midst of pandemic fear, faith appeared as a “knowing” deep in my gut that everything was going to be okay.

I have learned that with time, intention and love, I can make it through just about anything. However, this time, I lollygagged in faithlessness for quite a while before I chose to listen, accept the truth of faith and take action to feel better and get my life back.

Losing confidence and trust did a number on me. While I have visited this fear place occasionally through my life, this prolonged stay bewildered me, had me questioning who I was and what I was living for.

Dazed and confused, my eating, sleep, work and...

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But I Get Up Again...and Again

Nov 02, 2021

Living a few years on this planet, I’ve learned some big lessons that have changed me and my outlook on life. The pandemic and the overall political atmosphere over the last year and a half has been challenging for all of us and catastrophic for some. Many people picked up the ball and ran and some of us took shelter and tried to make sense of things that didn’t fit. I was one of the latter.

Thankfully, eternal truths have a way of letting you know they’re still around and still true – yes, eternal. Not that I forgot them, because I did not. However, I found that I re-learned them in a deeper sense… profoundly rooted in context and love.

Compelled to quickly share these  “re-learnings”, I have to say I’m more excited to demonstrate and write how they’ve changed me and how I’ve taken action to live differently because of them (hopefully, you’ll notice that in my future blog posts).

My Big 3

Fear begets fear

Early...

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Shed Old Baggage

Aug 24, 2021

Don’t Pinch Babies!
 
All reptiles shed their skin and it happens at different frequencies depending on the species. It’s a thing, it happens whether they want it to or not. When they are healthy, the reptile has a complete shedding resulting in a new beginning of sorts.
 
We humans shed our skin continuously, it’s not necessarily “a thing” and we often don’t notice it.
 
Similarly, our psyche works to shed our emotional baggage and it continues through our life, our whole life, even when we’re over sixty. It’s okay to deal with really, really old baggage as it comes up. Face it. See it as it is. Come to terms with it. Let it go. Move forward a little lighter and more joyfully like a crab or snake or scorpion.
 
Processing our “shitola” is essential in growing into a healthier, happier version of ourselves. It doesn’t usually happen naturally; we make a conscious choice to go forward with it....
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Focus on the Light

Aug 19, 2021

Throughout my life, I focused on my goals and what needed to be done to move forward towards them. I wore blinders, focused on the target areas and made great progress, usually meeting or exceeding my goals.

Fast forward – life has happened. Lots of it! 

I’m not working as much or as hard. I have time to be more reflective, peel back and heal some more layers of my life….and it’s still not easy, in fact, it’s quite difficult.

The world continues to spin. We go through our collective ups and downs, falling apart and putting back together, and the pendulum swings to the highest and furthest edges.

Confusion and fear permeate the air. It’s no wonder that I am struggling a bit. 

Besides our normal life transitions and happenings, there’s a new, different energy and it cannot be ignored. 

I’m slowly making my way through, and sometimes it’s a bit messy and other times it’s energetic and...

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