Your Type, Your Trap, and How To Drop It

We don’t need a new year to start over. Sometimes we just need a free afternoon and a little courage. Or maybe a full-on breakdown followed by a long walk and some soul searching.

If we’re honest: most of us are still carrying around baggage that no longer serves us. Not the usual “cut back on caffeine” stuff...I'm talking about the deeper junk. The stories we tell ourselves. The roles we keep playing. The emotional hand-me-downs we've outgrown but keep wearing anyway.

So before you go trying to fix your life with a new planner or another self-help book, maybe take a minute and ask: What do I actually need to stop dragging around with me? Because if we’re going to keep showing up for this wild ride of a life, we need to be lighter.

A Little Story About Me (And My Need for Perfection)

If you know anything about Enneagram Type 4s, you know we’ve got this thing about being special. We don’t just want to do things; we want to do them in a way that makes us feel unique, deep, and...dare I say...almost poetic. Sounds kinda cool, right? Except for the part where it turns into this relentless drive for perfection.

For years, I’ve held onto this idea that my writing, my work, my everything had to be this perfect version of my creative vision. If I couldn’t make it pure, emotionally deep & real, and aesthetically on-point, I wouldn’t share it. Guess what that got me? Stressed out and creatively blocked.

I’m learning to let go of the idea that my writing...or any of my work...needs to be this unrealistically high, curated version of myself. It doesn’t need to be perfect. It doesn’t need to change lives with every sentence. It just needs to be me...because, damn it, that’s pretty good. 

This year, I’ve been letting go of the perfection monster. I’ve kicked it to the curb. I’m giving myself permission to show up as I am, write what I want, and trust that’s enough.

Now, let’s talk about you.

What Each Enneagram Type Should Let Go Of

It’s time to get a little messy, a little irreverent, and a whole lot more real. 

Here’s what every Enneagram type needs to drop before the ball drops:

Type 1: Let Go of Your Inner Judge (It’s Exhausting)

You’ve spent another year listening to that little voice in your head telling you that you didn’t do it right, that it could’ve been better, that you should have done more. 

Your hard truth: You’re tired. We’re all tired. Let go of the need to be the moral police of your own life (and everyone else’s). Mistakes happen. Perfection is boring. Give yourself permission to screw up, laugh about it, and move on. You’ll be surprised at how freeing it is when you stop beating yourself up for being human.

Type 2: Let Go of Your Unspoken IOUs (Love Without the Strings)

You’ve been giving all year...your time, your energy, your emotional labor. And deep down, you’ve been hoping for a little recognition, a little love in return. 

Know this: The love you’re chasing isn’t coming from outside. It’s already in you. Let go of those quiet little expectations that others will return the favor or appreciate you the way you crave. Give without the invisible strings attached. You’ll find that true freedom comes when you let people love you for who you are, not for what you do.

Type 3: Let Go of the Show - We’re Onto You

You’ve been hustling, hitting those goals, making moves. You’ve got the image thing down, and everyone thinks you’ve got it all together. But what if...you you stopped caring so much about the show?

Let go of the need to prove yourself with every accomplishment. You’re more than your resume, more than your success story. When you stop performing for everyone else, you might just find that being your real amazing self is a  beautiful gift to everyone and whole lot more satisfying to you.

Type 4: Let Go of the Fantasy (Reality Isn’t So Bad)

Hey, my fellow Type 4s...we need to talk. We’ve spent a lot of time lost in our heads, imagining how things should be, how our lives could be more meaningful, more poetic, more…something. 

Here’s what I know: It’s time to let go of the fantasy and step into what’s real. The life you’re living right now is good enough. You are enough. Stop romanticizing the past or the future, and embrace the messy, beautiful present. It’s imperfect, sure, but so are we...and that’s kind of our magic.

Type 5: Let Go of Your Emotional Fort Knox (Let People In Already)

You’ve built walls, fortified them, and then built some more just to be safe. You guard your heart like it’s a top-secret vault and let people in? That’s risky business. 

But this is important: You’re missing out. Let go of the need to keep your emotions locked away. Vulnerability isn’t weakness...it’s connection. And guess what? You might find that people actually like you when you show them the real you, messy feelings and all.

Type 6: Let Go of the Plan (You’re Safe Without It)

You’ve spent the year planning for every possible outcome, mapping out your exit strategies, and making sure you’ve covered all the bases. 

But here’s a valuable secret: You don’t need to control everything to feel safe. Let go of the endless planning, the over-preparing, the constant second-guessing. Trust yourself. Trust that you can handle whatever comes your way...even without a perfect plan. The world won’t fall apart just because you didn’t think of every possible scenario.

Type 7: The Constant Exit Strategy (Sit Still, Just for a Minute)

You’ve been running, chasing the next thrill, the next idea, the next adventure, the next shiny thing. But in your endless search for what’s new, you’re missing what’s now. 

Let go of the need to always be on the move, always escaping from the present moment. Sit with your discomfort. Stay in one place long enough to feel all of it...the good, the bad, and everything in between. You might find that the real joy isn’t out there somewhere. It’s right here, waiting for you to slow down and notice.

Type 8: Let Go of the Armor (You Don’t Need It Anymore)

You’ve spent your life wearing that tough exterior, showing the world you don’t need anyone, that you can handle whatever comes your way. But just maybe...it’s time to take off the armor. 

Let go of the belief that vulnerability makes you weak. Let yourself be seen. You’re already strong, and showing your softer side won’t take that away. In fact, it might make you even more powerful.

Type 9: Let Go of the Avoidance (Your Voice Matters)

You’ve been keeping the peace, going along with the flow, staying out of conflict. But deep down, you know you’ve been avoiding more than just disagreements...you’ve been avoiding yourself. 

It’s time to step into the spotlight, to take up space, to let the world know what you want and who you are. 

Let go of the fear that your voice doesn’t matter. It does. We want to hear you. Say the thing. Rock the boat. Take up the damn space. You won’t break the world…you might just change it.

Letting Go Is Hard (But Staying Stuck Is Harder)

Here’s the truth: Letting go of the stuff we cling to isn’t easy. It feels safe, familiar, and sometimes it feels like it’s protecting us. But at the end of the day, holding onto all this BS is just making us heavy. It’s keeping us from showing up, from being real, from experiencing the depth and richness of our lives.

Let’s let the perfectionism, the expectations, the fears, and the crapola fall away. Let’s give ourselves permission to show up exactly as we are...imperfect, vulnerable, and human. And let’s trust that who we are is more than enough.

Letting go is scary. But staying stuck is worse.

So if something in this hit a nerve...good. That might be the thing you’re finally ready to drop. Not because it’s a new year or a full moon or Mercury is doing gymnastics in retrograde. Just because you’re ready to feel lighter, freer, and more like yourself.

That’s reason enough.

Love is ALL there is.

Diana