Can I Get A Connection?

"These days my waves get lost in the oceans,
seven billion swimmers, man I’m going through the motions"... 
"Can I Get A Connection" by OneRepublic

I met a friend this week to catch up and reconnect in a small, local restaurant and it was the highlight of my week! We shared our stories, laughed, teared up, and confided in one another. We exchanged small trinkets, nothing expensive, but the thoughtful gesture conveyed “I care about you”. When I left I felt inspired, loved and connected, and realized that I don’t feel this way nearly as much as I would like. Connection with people who care about us adds greatly to the quality of our lives.

Connecting grounds me and reminds me who I am at my core. Why don’t I do more of it?

As I reflected on this question I remembered that I identify as an introvert but could possibly be an ambivert, (a person whose personality has a balance of extrovert and introvert features) except I don’t have a balance of both, I’m definitely heavier on the introvert side. So, for me, the one-on-one meetings and small group gatherings work best. I tend to avoid the rest, if I can.

I’ve been guilty of “going through the motions” as OneRepublic succinctly stated in their song, but things are changing for me. I’m becoming more intentional and strategic with who and how I connect. I’m appropriately “connected” via social media and the telephone and find it has great value. I’m staying in touch with people I know or am acquainted with. I get to see some of the milestones in their lives and stay up on what’s going on with them. I love the learning through the “experts” on the internet and working with private small groups because I can connect on a more personal basis. I’m super appreciative of this opportunity, because like so many others, my life is quite busy, and it seems overwhelming to me, to meet with all the people I care about, and then get out to learn everything I want to learn. 

But like others, I find that social media is not a replacement for being with another human being, hearing the tone of their voice – the excitement, concern or sadness they convey. Or seeing the gleam in their eye as I make actual eye contact with them. Or partaking in that “I care about you” hello and goodbye hug.

Nothing beats meeting up with people in person. 

This year one of my value words is “connection”. Connecting with others brings me joy and I want more joy in my life. Since I’m the designer of my life, I’ve set the intention that I will thoughtfully plan for more connectiveness. For me, this means a healthy balance between technology and being there physically. Most of my work is done from home via the internet so I’m on the computer and telephone a lot. I reach out, write, talk, respond and have video meetings on a daily basis. I’m inspired and productive and do what I love to do. However, it’s easy to burn out some days, to feel like something’s missing and that’s why I know I need to get out and “connect” in other ways. But when it’s not on my “To Do” list I often push it aside. Not happening this year!

This year I’m scheduling opportunities for connection. I’ll continue following my social media peeps and learning great stuff from others online. Twice a week, I’ll get out and meet with another person, perhaps occasionally someone new, outside of work and family. I moved recently and do not know anyone in my new town. Opportunity, right? As an introvert, this makes me a bit uncomfortable, but as a functioning adult, I know I can make it happen.

I also seek connection with nature. Fortunately for me, I live in a rural mountain town that provides many places and spaces to make that happen. Heck, all I have to do is get out and take a walk around my neighborhood. I got this!

I’ve set the intention, now I put the effort and action behind it to make it happen. I’m kind of excited about this! 

If you want to learn more about yourself and what brings you joy, so you can set your own individualized intentions and plan, please download the free PDF file on this page, Ten Questions You Can Design Your Life Around. These questions will help you rediscover who you are, what your priorities are and what brings you joy!

Hope to connect with again soon!

Diana